We’ve all seen the viral posts about women who work tirelessly to meet sky-high expectations, excel in their career, be a good mom, maintain a social life, get 8 hours of sleep and stay mentally balanced.
Women, now more than ever, experience complex, chaotic lives that increase daily stress which can lead to burnout and other mental health issues. Many modern women are caught in a balancing act between their career, children, household and family – all while managing the social and cultural demands placed upon women to be pleasant and look good.
Studies on burnout show that women are more likely to experience burnout than their male counterparts. While women are more likely to ask for help, it’s important to recognize why women are more burnt out, stressed, and depressed, and talk about what we can do to support them.
What is burnout?
Burnout is a result of chronic, overwhelming stress. It is mental, physical, and emotional exhaustion that causes overall fatigue, low motivation, anxiety, headaches, insomnia and stomach issues.
Burnout can seem like depression, so it’s important to speak with a psychiatrist or psychiatric nurse practitioner to receive the proper support. Burnout can be caused by many things, including:
- Difficulty at work
- Ongoing high-stress situations
- Lack of sleep
- Lack of support systems
- Work-life imbalance
- High-pressure work environments
You might be more susceptible to burnout if you are a woman, have a high-pressure job, are in certain stages of life (like early motherhood), or are a type A person with a competitive nature. Teachers, health care workers, and those who work in finance are reported to be more likely to experience burnout.
What are the symptoms of burnout?
The symptoms of burnout will be unique to each person but can include the following:
- Feeling exhausted and overwhelmed
- Irritability and anxiety
- Feeling pessimistic, hopeless or numb
- Loss of motivation or determination
- Feeling overwhelmed
- Trouble concentrating or making decisions
- Procrastinating
- Reduced productivity
- Withdrawing from social activities
- Less interest in hobbies or activities you normally enjoy
Physical signs of burnout:
- Stomach issues
- High blog pressure
- Getting sick often
- Headaches or migraines
- Insomnia
- Exhaustion that doesn’t improve with sleep
Why are more women burnt out than men?
In society, and in the household, women have silent, enforced expectations that their male counterparts do not experience. Women experience significant strain attempting to achieve work-life balance and manage the mental load of their families.
- The Caregiver: women are more likely to be the caregiver, default parent, and elderly caretaker, than men. In the U.S., 26% of women report being a caregiver, vs 22% of men.
- Balancing work and life: mothers who are employed report higher rates of burnout than men. An estimated 2.35 million women in the workplace report feeling burnt out since the beginning of Covid pandemic in 2019.
- Unequal household labor: Even if working full time, women carry the load of most of the domestic labor at home. Women are required to domestically manage a household while also raising children experience additional strain and stress that impact their quality of life.
- Social expectations: Societal pressures are placed on women to be agreeable and positive, which can lead to a lack of boundary-setting. Boundaries are essential tools to ensuring you feel emotionally, physically and mentally protected against things that create stress in your life. Setting proper boundaries, especially in the workplace and in relationships, is essential to overall wellness.
- Pressure to look good: According to a Pew research study, the trait that is reported to be the most valued for women is their attractiveness, with their empathy, kindness and nurturing following a close second. Whether in the workplace or in their personal lives, women are faced with strong expectations about their physical appearance, which might be why 1 in 3 women have an eating disorder (compared to 1 in 5 men).
- The Mental Load: Your son needs to get in with his pediatrician, your daughter needs new soccer cleats, and your elderly mother needs specific groceries at the store. These are all examples of the running to-do list women keep in their head compared to their counterparts. The mental load is how much thinking you do daily about all the things that need to be completed, often about domestic, household and family work. The partner that carries the mental load of the family must delegate (in detail) to their partner in order for them to participate. Often, the mental load is also considered the invisible load, which can feel important but may go unnoticed by other family members. The invisibility of mental load work can create feelings of worthlessness and exhaustion, leading to burnout.
What you can do for a loved one who’s living with burnout
If you have a loved one who is experiencing burnout, it’s important to be supportive. However, it can be a challenge to know what your next steps are. It can help to provide active support that takes some of the workload off someone with burnout, including:
- Lighten the load for your partner or co-parent: take over various tasks for your children, like making doctors’ appointments, managing extracurricular activities and making dinner.
- Provide active support for them that allows for rest: this could include providing a free afternoon for your spouse to rest or prioritize themselves. Be sure to encourage rest or activities they enjoy.
- Encourage healthy coping mechanisms: reading a book, going to the beach, or taking a nap are all productive ways to rest and support yourself with burnout.
- Listen without judging: When burnt out, everything may feel overwhelming, and that’s okay. Listen to your partner or friend and take time to understand their point of view.
- Help them find professional support: Whether it’s individualized therapy or couples therapy, therapy and psychiatry can help support those with burnout by managing symptoms.
Things to consider if you’re burnt out
If you’re burnt out, taking time for yourself is essential. Whether it’s getting extra sleep or doing something you enjoy, both are productive ways to help decrease feelings of burn out.
- Take time off work: Even if you only take a day a month, it’s important to block out time for yourself.
- Nourish your creativity: Remember that painting class you loved? Or that author you loved reading? Go back to your roots. Returning to activities that you once enjoyed can feel invigorating and restful.
- Carve out time for relaxation: Identify what makes you feel relaxed and book time in your schedule for more of it. Maybe it’s a walk on your lunch break, journaling at night, or meditating in the morning. Regardless of what it is, finding a few minutes of your day to slow down is essential to recovering from burnout.
- Sleep/sleep hygiene: Sleep is essential for reducing symptoms of burnout. Following a consistent sleep schedule, implementing a specific bedtime routine, and adding breathing exercises in the evening can support good sleep. Avoiding caffeine too late in the day is also supportive of sound sleep.
- Set boundaries: Take inventory of the energy you’re expensing throughout the day – and decide where you are being stretched too thin. Setting a boundary could be offloading a household chore to your partner on an ongoing basis or explaining to your boss that you will not be working overtime.
- Prioritize nutrition: A balanced diet can provide you with energy to combat stress and fatigue throughout the day.
- Get professional support: Getting help from a therapist and a psychiatrist during a time where you are struggling with burnout can help manage your symptoms and give you space to talk about your concerns. Medication may be helpful in managing anxiety levels.
Remember, recovering from burnout is a journey. Making small, manageable changes on an ongoing basis can help.
If you need support for burnout, our psychiatrists and therapist can help.
Find a local trusted mental health provider now and start your personalized journey to a happier, healthier you. At Elite DNA, we accept nearly every insurance plan in Florida including Medicare and Medicaid.
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