By Elizabeth Dosoretz, Founder, CEO, & LCSW at Elite DNA Behavioral Health
Across Southwest Florida, students are celebrating graduations, attending parties, and enjoying the freedom that comes with summer break. For many families, it is simply the start of another summer. For others, it is something much bigger.
This summer, many parents are quietly preparing for something they have spent nearly two decades working toward: sending a child to college.
The Weight of “The Last Summer”
As both a mental health professional and a parent preparing to send my own child to college, I have learned that the hardest part is not move-in day, orientation, or even the first day of classes. The hardest part is often the summer before. It is the realization that this may be the last summer that life looks the way it always has.
On the surface, there is plenty to do. Families are shopping for dorm room essentials, planning campus visits, reviewing class schedules, and checking items off endless lists. There is excitement, anticipation, and pride.
But underneath all of that, there is often something else. There is the awareness that a chapter is ending.
The Emotional Reality for Students Preparing for College
Students are experiencing their own mix of emotions. They are excited about independence, new friendships, and the opportunities that college will bring. At the same time, many are nervous about leaving behind what is familiar. Even students who cannot wait to leave often have moments of uncertainty and fear about the unknown.
Research suggests these feelings are far more common than many families realize. Studies have found that anxiety often increases during the summer before college and continues through the first academic year. In fact, nearly 40% of college students report significant symptoms of anxiety.
While parents often focus on practical preparations, it is just as important to recognize the emotional preparation that both students and families are navigating.
When a Parent’s Role Begins to Shift
What makes this transition challenging is that both excitement and sadness can exist at the same time. Parents often tell me they feel guilty for being emotional because they are proud of their child. The truth is that pride and grief are not opposites. You can feel both simultaneously.
In many ways, this transition represents a form of anticipatory grief. No one has been lost, but something is changing. The daily routines, spontaneous conversations, and constant presence of a child in your home are about to look different.
The transition to college brings several major life changes all at once. It is no surprise that this period can feel overwhelming, even for students who are excited about what lies ahead.
For years, much of a parent’s life revolves around school schedules, sports, activities, appointments, and family routines. Then suddenly, you realize your role is beginning to shift. You move from managing daily life to becoming more of a guide, mentor, and source of support.
That adjustment can be difficult, but it can also be incredibly rewarding.
Staying Present Before the Transition
One of the most important things families can do during this final summer is simply be present. Often, the moments we remember most are the ordinary ones.
- Have dinner together.
- Take a walk.
- Watch a movie.
- Sit on the couch and talk.
- Put the phones away occasionally and enjoy being together.
These moments matter more than we realize.
It is also important to have honest conversations before college begins. Discuss expectations about communication, visits home, finances, independence, and responsibilities. Many of the conflicts families experience during the first year of college come not from disagreements but from assumptions that were never discussed.
Staying Connected Through Change
When students return home for holidays and breaks, both parents and children may discover they have changed. Students often come home with greater independence and different expectations, while parents naturally fall back into familiar routines. Open communication helps everyone navigate those changes with less frustration and more understanding.
One of the most encouraging findings from the research is that strong family relationships continue to matter, even after students leave home. Consistent support, healthy communication, and a sense of connection remain some of the strongest protective factors during the college transition.
Students do not need parents to solve every problem, but they benefit from knowing someone is still in their corner as they learn to navigate challenges on their own.
What It Means to Let Them Go
While this transition can be emotional, it is also a reminder that the years of parenting have accomplished exactly what they were meant to accomplish.
We do not raise children to need us forever. We raise them to leave us. That does not make it easy.
But there is something incredibly meaningful about watching a child step into the next chapter of life carrying the values, lessons, love, and support that have shaped them along the way.
The summer before college is not just a goodbye to childhood. It is also the beginning of a new relationship between parent and child—one built less on daily routines and more on trust, respect, and confidence in the person they are becoming.
And while that transition can bring tears, it can also bring tremendous pride, gratitude, and hope for what comes next.
Seeking Professional Help
At Elite DNA Behavioral Health, we offer comprehensive mental health care. You don’t have to navigate this by yourself. Our clinicians provide compassionate, personalized support to help you heal and feel like yourself again.
Elite DNA Behavioral Health has more than 40 locations across Florida and Virginia.
Find a clinic near you.
Schedule in-person care, or telehealth.
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